Are you in or out?
We’ve all had to adapt to very different lives over the course of the past year. One of the areas that has changed the most in my household is Church. We rarely miss a Sunday, and are at church most Wednesday evenings. Under normal circumstances.
Circumstances are anything but normal.
We started off back in the Spring of 2020 with LOTs of virtual meetings and live streams on our calendar:
- Wednesday night Kid’s Missions
- Wednesday night Youth
- Women’s Bible Study
- Life Group
- Sunday Morning Worship.
We found those, at times, to be extremely draining. Maybe you had the same experience? You want to ‘attend’ and be present…and so you do, meanwhile…you’re doing whatever you were doing at home up until the VERY MINUTE the meeting starts…so, you’re brain never really shuts down or resets.
Here is what I think may have contributed to the problem for my family:
- There’s no downtime before the meeting to get dressed, freshen up, drive, walk, etc, to the event
- The household members NOT participating in the meeting had to tip toe around everyone else.
- People (close family and friends – my mother literally lives across the street) still ‘popped in’ unannounced, and didn’t know or care about whatever meeting was happening.
- The dogs still did their things.
- We didn’t always remember to mute our phones, and it’s hard to not just ‘glance’ at a text or see who’s calling. out of habit.
- There’s no downtime afterward to process and decompress or unpack the interactions.
So, we basically just stopped going – with the exception of my daughter attending the Children’s virtual meetings on Wednesdays and Sunday live streams…we just stopped.
And, then, because our church was closed for so long and many households were doing it on their own anyway, our church helped to coordinate ‘house church’ with several families and households. And I JUMPED at the chance to be able to worship with just a small group of my church family, and to witness to families who may need some fellowship and human contact. We had mixed attendendance…most Sunday’s it was just us and one other family – but it was still ABSOLUTELY precious time that I will always cherish.
And then the numbers in our city and county went up. And when I say they went up, I mean they SPIKED – students were being quarantined due to contact tracing, the schools could barely keep open for lack of staff that wasn’t either sick or quarantined, people were starting to isolate themselves more than they had in months – keeping to small circles of friends, family and classmates, in order to avoid exposure to COVID-19 and to avoid potentially spreading the virus should they have been unknowingly exposed.
At around the same time, both of my husband’s parent’s were hospitalized and, eventually, lost the fight against this relentless virus. While they were hospitalized, we basically locked our family down with the exception of school and work in order to avoid any potential exposure. With my husband and his siblings hoping for (while also dreading because they would know what it meant) an opportunity to visit with their parents, we just decided it was best all around to isolate as much as possible. We even cancelled the Christmas dinner we normally host. House church was cancelled. I even had our home/invitation removed from the church’s website.
Our church planned on finally opening back up this past Sunday morning with limited capacity. And then the ice storm came…the parking lot and most roads were like skating rinks. So, our pastor streamed the sermon from home. We’ll try again this week…and though I hadn’t actually planned on attending last week (wanting to give that precious space and fellowship opportunity to those who may need it more than I), I’m still on the fence about this week.
All this to say – we’ve basically been out of the habit of ‘going to church’ for close to a year now. It’s starting to get tough to get everyone in one room together long enough to stream the sermon.
What might I have done different in the beginning had I known how long this would last, and how much it would impact our lives? So many things…but hindsight is 20/20. I’d love to know, in the comments, what has kept you connected to your church these past few months? Here are a few things I think may have helped our family:
- Sit down and unwind about 30 minutes before any scheduled meetings.
- pray
- have a cup of coffee or tea
- listen to music
- Set up a space in a spare room, or even just a corner of a bedroom, to attend virtual meetings.
- Shut off all other electronics, including virtual assistants, televisions, phones, etc…
- Lock the doors, maybe even put a sign up that says ‘in a meeting’ or ‘do not disturb’.
- Give myself permission to turn the camera off during virtual meetings.
- Though eye contact, and everyone seeing each other is wonderful, maybe just knowing I don’t have to sit still so as to stay in frame, or not to distract others, or just to be able to sit comfortably on the couch might have made these meetings feel less exhausting.
- Choose one person that is a part of the group and call them about 30-45 minutes before the meeting, or even immediately following the meeting. This gives a little unpressured fellowship time that we would normally have had with in person meetings.
If every our priorities and relationship with Christ were to be examined, this is the year.
It can be so easy to get the majority of our ‘Bible Study’ done when we go to church…but that’s not really eating and serving, is it? That’s eating – being fed…
How’s our relationship with Jesus at home?
- Do we spend time in prayer daily? Intentionally?
- Do we sit down and read, absorb, even devour, the word of God on a daily basis?
- Do we seek out other ways to feed our spirits? Are we attending bible study online? Reading books or blogs?
- Are we SERVING others? Are we living out our Faith by feeding the Gospel and word of God to those around us? Virutually or in persona?
- Are we renewing our connections and modeling for our children what it means to have an active life of Faith and true connection to God?
- Are we encouraging our children to study the word independently?
- Are we studdying the word independently and as a family?
Are those things happening? Or are we just biding our time until we can go back to church?
Luke Chapter 12 teaches us that we must strive, always, to draw closer to God and have a relationship with him. We have a very narrow door to walk thorugh – and it takes a daily effort to get throug it…
This doesn’t mean that that the things we do, our actions, will get us into heaven… it only means that our heavenly father longs for connection and relationship with us…if we do not know him, he does not bring us through that door.
LISTENING to Jesus is NOT the same thing as Knowing Jesus.
We can listen all we want to – and understand and believe… but if we are to truly know Jesus, we must understand His teachings, converse with Him, pray to Him, and strive, though we will forever fall short of His Glory, daily to be more like Him and closer to him.
I have found in the past year, that I am just a little more diligent and consistent about picking up my Bible, even if it is just to journal, and find myself seeking out other resources (books, sermons, blogs, articles, etc…) to better understand certain passages and topics.
The old Hymn, a Closer Walk with Thee comes to mind. Here is a lovely, classic rendition performed by Ilona & Jonathan Welch. I have the absolute honor of being very close to their daughter, and just love hearing their voices as well as hers!
I am weak but Thou art strong
Jesus keep me from all wrong
I’ll be satisfied as long
As I walk, let me walk close to Thee
Just a closer walk with Thee
Grant it, Jesus, is my plea
Daily walking close to Thee
Let it be, dear Lord, let it be
When my feeble life is o’er
Time for me will be no more
Guide me gently, safely o’er
To Thy kingdom’s shore, to Thy shore
Just a closer walk with Thee
Grant it, Jesus, is my plea
Daily walking close to Thee
Let it be, dear Lord, let it be
Just a Closer Walk with Thee, Author Unknown.
I encourage you, today, to make the time to sit down with quiet reflection and look at your relationship with Jesus over the past year.
Has it grown stronger or weakened? How can you overcome any obstacles to making it stronger?
Remind your self that God wins – he is stronger and more powerful than any enemy or distractions we may have.
Please, for the benefit of other readers, what routines, thoughts, strategies, etc, help you to stay focused on your relationship with Christ? If this is something that you struggle with, will you comment so that we can pray for you?
Much Love to you and yours!
Cindi
Self proclaimed Godmother of the Messy Bun Mafia.